dont believe the truth

i dont usually post here, but a lucky few ppl get to read this private record of thoughts....

today the 26th of april 06, marks the 9 year anniversery of my fathers death.... as cliche-ed as it sounds, time realy flies by so fast... sometimes i marvel at how fast time passes us by, and its scary when you think about it... few ppl can remember what they did last week, let alone 10 years ago... but to me this days is as vivid as ever...

what was supposed to be a time of celebration turn into a night that changed my family forever... looking back, i felt so nieve thinking that my dad was out having an affair with someone else besides my mom... swear to god, that was what i was thinking when he didnt come home that night...

it seems so clear now... the waiting at the balcony, the hope that he might still be alive, the new the police officer brought, and the tears that flowed soon after... we cried ourselves to sleep that night, except my mom, whose mind was probably too worries about the future to sleep... imagine havng to raise your family by yourself... the only person you have to rely on yourself.. thats scary shit man...

the most important lessons in life are taught through the most painful lessons, arent they... the greatest gift in the world is to love, and to be loved, to be thankful for each breath that you get to take, and to be in the experience of all that is in life... to live for the moment, the now... to understand that life isant fair, and that you should punch the asshole who told you that it is... to know that in life, shit happens... but more importantly, SHIT HAPPENED... past tense, already happened...